Posts Tagged ‘Nick Toney’


Posted: April 19, 2011 by jerkmag in VAULT -- archives
Tags: , ,

One night not too long ago, soccer, lacrosse, rugby, and basketball all lubed up, hopped in bed, and banged.  Condom? What condom?

Their bastard child popped out all over the Internet this week. It’s called Kronum, and God/Buddha/Chuck Norris save us. We’re not ready for it. (more…)

It still is to this captain of an Atlanta-area rec team. This guy isn’t dicking around; he takes his kickball seriously.  So when his team gets bounced 20-0 in a league meant for fun, his teammates came home to an inbox full of hate e-mail. It’s comedic gold: (more…)

I can’t dance.

The Italian side of me turns every slow jam into a weird combo of Jersey Shore fist bumping and the hokey pokey. My neighbor’s two Labrador retrievers come to mind when I see people grinding—they’re in the yard, humping each other’s brains out. I save myself the trouble and go play beer pong at parties, and it feels lame. (more…)

Meet the Jerk Bloggers: Nick Toney

Posted: February 14, 2011 by jerkmag in VAULT -- archives

Nick Toney, Play blogger

Hey team, the name’s Nick Toney. Get pumped because I’ll be the one catching you up on all things sports. Here’s a little bit about me:

Major: Mag Journalism

Year: Sophomore

Hometown: Ballston Spa, NY (Fun fact: highest teen pregnancy rate in NY State)

Favorite Breakfast Cereal: My last name is Toney, so I gotta go with the Tiger–Frosted Flakes.

One Lie I Got Away With: “Don’t sleep here, I snore pretty bad.”

Two things on my bucket list: learn harmonica and open a bar

Three Celebrities I Love: Rachel McAdams, Jason Segel, Helga Pataki