Originally, I was going to make this about how the only time you hear about violent extremism, it is almost always right-wing ‘patriots’ who seem to think that bigotry, hatred and violence are the most American thing since apple pie. Unfortunately, the douchebag Occupy Oakland vandals decided to piss all over that for me. But regardless, their petty acts of vandalism pale in comparison to the level of violence planned in Georgia by a group of right-wing geriatrics that I will loathsomely dub ‘Faketriots.’

Apparently, these Faketriots decided they had enough of government intervention, all likely while being on Social Security and Medicare, and decided that it was time to heave themselves off their hemorrhoid doughnuts, take a beta blocker and after Bingo, plot a little domestic terrorism.

"Sorry, can't watch "Price Is Right" with you. I've got plans..."

The four Faketriot militiamen are accused of plotting to spread the deadly toxin ricin on a freeway, blow up a federal building and assassinate politicians and judges. All this was done in the name of saving America. The militia leader, Fredrick Thomas, is quoted as saying “There is no way for us, as militiamen, to save this country, to save Georgia, without doing something that’s highly illegal: murder.” He followed this by saying, “When it comes to the constitution, that means some people gotta die.”

The men had weapons stockpiled, purchasing what they believed to be C4 from an undercover FBI agent and were attempting to figure out a way to refine ricin. This was a real threat. This is not the first time a group like this has attempted an attack of this nature. In 2010, the militia group Hutaree was charged with plotting to kill police officers and their families. These two incidents are far from only examples of this. Get ready, this is where I go into ranting mode.

All these extremist right-wing militia need to realize that the only thing America needs to be saved from is YOU. You are a threat to this country, and you sure as hell are not patriots. You are terrorists, no better than the Islamic extremists you claim to hate so much. America doesn’t need you or your blind hatred, you Faketriots.

You guys should be BFFs.

-Alex Perez

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