Getting Vaccinated, Ladies, Are You Retarded? Michelle Bachmann Says Yes.

Posted: September 27, 2011 by jerkmag in RANT -- politics
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I was recently informed that my hard-bitten political musings are a representation of me as a writer both personally and professionally. I guess that holds some cause for concern, but the way I see it is if Laura Bush can get away with Involuntary Vehicular Manslaughter, then I still have a decent shot at Secretary of State despite calling Tea Partiers stupid. Oh, you didn’t know? Laura Bush killed a guy.

So, with that out of the way I’d like to move onto another bit of monumental political stupidity that has become so proudly part of our lives as Americans. Apparently, and I did not know this, you ladies out there who have received the HPV vaccine Gardasil run the risk of mental retardation. And by “retarded” I mean the medical, Sarah Palin-friendly sense of the word, not the typical use normally associated with Mrs. Palin.

This striking medical news is according to presidential candidate Michelle Bachmann, who is also well known for enlightening us about the fictitious $200 million a day presidential visit to Asia as well as asserting that slavery produced a ‘mutual esteem’ rather than, oh I don’t know, mass oppression, racial subjection and a belief in genetic superiority.

Nevermind the fact that vaccines are thought to induce autism. (Which is stupid enough.) Congratulations Mrs.Bachmann, you’ve managed to take stupidity to a whole new level. At a certain point, one must admire her sheer level of idiocy. To those of you who believe vaccinations are lethal, I defer you to my friend, Dr. House. And on an evolutionary basis, I also suggest you do not procreate.

The problem I really have with all of this is not just the fact that this woman is a presidential contender, but the fact that she is believed by millions. Leaders are comprised of the followers that make them, and the fact that she is still a Tea Party endorsed candidate speaks volumes for that organization. Illusions are always strong in the eye of the pretender.

-Alex Perez

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