This was the apparent slogan for one employee at the Dunkin Donuts of Route 46 in Parsippany, New Jersey. Her name is Melissa Redmond, a 29 -year-old from the area, who worked the overnight shift from 9 p.m. to 5 a.m., offering some customers a little more bang for their buck.  An anonymous tip led Detective Sgt. Kyle Schwarzmann on a six week case which he dubbed “Extra Sugar.” He caught Redmond on several occasions following customers to their cars and spending close to 15 minutes with each one. She was finally arrested after displaying a list of services and prices to an undercover officer. Oops!  I just really hope she washed her hands before returning to work.

How could things have been that bad that she had to resort to selling her body? I obviously don’t know her whole life story, but I’ll put money on the fact that she was living life at least decently. She was employed by an actual establishment, making money. My guess is she’s just a sex addict who, for some reason, didn’t get hired at Grab and Go Bikini Hut.

If you aren’t familiar, Grab and Go Bikini Hut is a coffee place in Everett, Washington where rather than a conservative uniform or green apron, baristas don bikinis. I wonder how awkward interviewing for that job must be, considering the owner of the coffee shop is a man. Think they have to wear the bikini to the interview? Back in 2009, some of these baristas were arrested for prostitution after undercover officers caught them charging customers extra to let them touch their bodies, among other sexual acts, including licking whipped cream off one another and posing for nude pictures.

What is it with baristas and prostitution lately? I guess now is a bad time to admit I am a barista myself. Probably not the prostituting kind you were hoping for, but I can make you a great latte, topped off with foam in the shape of a heart. But that’s the farthest I would ever go for a cute guy in line.

-Julia Fuino


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