Cleared for Competition

Posted: July 4, 2011 by jerkmag in VAULT -- archives
Tags: , , ,

There was a major panic attack in Brooklyn at Nathan’s Hot Dogs last weekend when a contender for the annual Fourth of July  International Hot Dog Eating Contest hot dog eating contest possibly could not participate this holiday weekend. Do not worry, all has been solved.

Lui Ming Kui, one of the three participants representing China this year, had not secured his visa as of last weekend. Nathan’s and the event’s organizers were originally unsure what this complication could mean for the competition. George Shea, the man in charge of the competition, stated, “We at Major League Eating fear that it may reflect poorly on the U.S. if he is unable to compete, especially if the world views it as an attempt by us to prevent China from winning the belt.”

Shea sent a letter to Secretary of State Hillary Clinton for her assistance with the issue. Kui has since received his green card, although it appears Clinton was not involved. This now makes him eligible to compete in today’s Fourth of July tradition. Good luck, Kui. Remember to breathe while you are stuffing your face with some good ol’ American hot dogs. Same goes for all you Jerks attending multiple BBQs today!

-Nicole Fisher

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Comments
  1. winiko says:

    Nice Post, Thanks for that awesome posting.

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