Randy Moss Murders Brett Favre

Posted: October 18, 2010 by jerkmag in VAULT -- archives
Tags: , , ,

 

SI

 

Earlier this week, the New England Patriots traded an unhappy Randy Moss to the Minnesota Vikings. In return, the Patriots will receive the Vikings third round draft pick next year.  Some saw this as a suicidal move for the Patriots, but I think it’s really a suicidal move for…Brett Favre.

The guy is famous for a couple of reasons. He’s a great football player, for sure. He’s also been in and out of retirement as many times as Lindsay Lohan’s been in and out of rehab.  Randy’s move to the Vikings means Favre should keep playing, at least until he drops dead on the field when the Vikings start doing well.

Typical football players retire around 35. Favre was born in 1969. You know what happened in 1969? We landed on the moon.

Randy Moss, you have effectively sentenced Brett Favre to death. I hope you’re happy.

~Meghin Delaney

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Comments
  1. D-Dub says:

    THE TOP 3 QUARTERBACKS IN THE NFL ARE:
    Brett Favre, Tony Romo, and Donovan McNabb

    Drew Brees doesn’t make the list because he’s 120 pounds and wears skirts in public.

    Let’s see….
    Brett Favre has A BROKEN ANKLE,
    Romo has A BROKEN COLLARBONE (Thank you Michael Boley for destroying Romo from the Cowgirls and also Moore from the Panthers! You’re my favorite even though I never root for the Giants!),
    and McNabb is.. uh.. PERFECTLY FINE!!!!
    Redskins all the way, baby! Sa, sa, sa, SUPERBOWL SUPERBALLIN’!!!!

  2. D-Dub says:

    I forgot Manning. That’s messed up. Romo wouldn’t have made the cut had I remembered the Colts ten seconds ago when I wrote that crap ^^^^ That mistake doesn’t change the fact that I feel no empathy for any injury of a dallas cowboy or any other pro-athlete old enough to be my grandfather

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