So once again, I will be valentine-less this February the 14th. But hey, why not go out and see this romantic comedy with the girls? And then if one of them is attached, tell her to go screw herself. And then possibly her boyfriend.

I have never seen so many big names in one production–can we say, all-star cast? We’ve got Ashton Kutcher, Jessica Alba, Jennifer Garner, Julia Roberts, Jamie Foxx, Anne Hathaway, Patrick Dempsey, and Queen Latifah, to name a few. Oh, and don’t forget Taylor Swift and her ever-dreamy boyfriend Taylor Lautner (Yes, New Moon surely has turned me to Team Jacob).

From what I can tell from the Love Actually-esque trailer filled with laughs, tears, and Emma Roberts declaring her desire for sex, T. Laut and T. Swift play the homecoming king and queen, which does cause me to wonder if Taylor Swift will ever leave high school. I mean, after her combination of writing songs that relate to every teenage girl’s life and the infamous Kanye incident, we all love her. But what is she, twenty? Don’t get me wrong, I can recite every word to “Love Story” with happiness and glee. But someday, it will get old; just look at our reactions to Michael Cera. After watching him lose his virginity for the fifth time, even I feel a bit slighted.

I’m very interested to see what Bradley Cooper is up to in this film, because all I can think of is his jerk off character from He’s Just Not That Into You, which put me into a depressive state for about four days post viewing. Word on the web is that Cooper is actually pursuing Eric Dane in this film. A watered down version of Brokeback Mountain perhaps? Sounds fabulous to me.

But with the beautiful cast, snarky dialogue, and incredibly high payroll, Valentine’s Day looks to be a sweet delight for those of us who are missing our own sugar daddies this February. Who cares if we’re single? At least we can stare at Taylor Lautner’s spray-on abs all we want.

~Bridget Greene

  1. Joe Joe says:

    A more appropriate title for this movie would be “He’s Just Not That Into You 2: more undeveloped rom com plots that didn’t warrant their own movie so we sewed them together with the spirit but not the heart of Love Actually to attract lonely, single women on Valentine’s Day oh and look at that it’s another female journalist character”

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