The Walk of Shame vs The Walk of Fame

Posted: October 2, 2008 by jerkmag in VAULT -- archives

I open my eyes and realize it’s Sunday morning. My head is pounding, so I reach over to my desk to get some Tylenol. I’m still pretty out of it from the night before, so I can’t even get up. I suddenly sense someone behind me still sleeping. “Oh shit!”, I whisper, “Where am I?”. I slowly turn over to look at the, hopefully, smokin’ hot guy. “DAMN!” I say, It’s only my best friend. I wake her up, and we both decide to go down stairs to the kitchen to get something to drink, and find my friend who lives there. The house smells like alcohol, and it’s making me nauseas, so my friend and I decide to go back to our dorm and then go have a big ass breakfast.

I’m actually feeling pretty embarrassed at this point. Walking down Euclid wearing the “sexy” outfit from last night is the last thing I want to do. I begin to walk faster and faster, and wishing that no one sees me. We pass Frat Row, and of course all the frat boys have to be outside, great, just my luck. “Is this the walk of shame or the walk of fame ladies”, a guy shouts and then starts laughing while pointing at us. All of sudden, they stop.

A new victim is walking out from one of the houses wearing guy clothes. They begin to verbally attack her, but she keeps walking with a huge smile on her face. My friend looks at me and states, “Now THAT, is the walk of fame.”  I think about the comment for a minute while checking the victim out. How can that be the walk of fame? She is publicly walking out from an all guys house, and wearing guy clothes, so wouldn’t that be considered “shameful”?  My friend thinks otherwise. As she explains, “no orgasm is a walk of shame…you can tell when someone has the walk of fame.”

We arrive to our dorm, and change into more comfortable clothes. I fix my hair, brush my teeth, and take off the smeared eyeliner and purple eye shadow. We go downstairs to have the weekly Sunday breakfast with the rest of the crew, and to talk about how our nights ended up being. While downing the delicious cheese omelet I ask the table, “So what exactly makes the walk of shame, shameful?”. They begin to shout out answers like having bad sex with the guy or girl, regretting the action the next day, in the end not doing anything because one passed out, walking back with extra large guy clothes or even walking with the trashy clothes from the night before, screwed up hair, and smeared eyeliner. Well that last comment made me blush, alright!

Look, even if you girls had a great end of the night, it is still shameful for all of you to walk back home. That is just how society is meant to think. We all, guys AND girls, conform to the idea that for guys is the walk of fame, where for girls is the walk of shame said our guy friend. Not a smart move there buddy, I thought, specially saying that at a table full of girls. The sad part is, that it is true. Not only do we get judged by guys, but girls are the worst critics. So, let’s stop criticizing, and start walking with no shame. Look! Shit happens, its college and the point of these four years is to have fun, and have stories to tell in the future.

Besos,

Lola

Comments
  1. […] video is probably every girl’s worst nightmare. It’s bad enough having to walk home in the same clothes you had on the night before, but to have an entire frat applaud you and last night’s man as you […]

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