The 5 Grossest iPhone Apps

• My Vibe

Literally transforms your iPhone into a vibrator. Ladies, be courteous and don’t let other people use your phone afterwards. They don’t want to put your sex toy against their cheek.

Cost: Free!

Turn your iPhone into a vibrator for $0.

[VIDEO] German Cats Singing ‘Silent Night’

Happy holidays, y’all!

[VIDEO] PooTrap: Cover Your Dog’s Poop Shoot

Pootrap, “the magical poop collector,” essentially forces dogs to walk around with little plastic baggies blooming out of backdoor.

Facebook Fail: Engaged Woman Publicly Invites Man into “Cave Between Her Legs”

This woman is at least 40 years old… Further proof that the elderly  should not be on Facebook. No word yet on how her fiance feels about this.

Yahoo! Answers: Bit Someone in Park Today? Pigeons Left :’(

I hate when that happens.

[VIDEO] Ex-Masturbator Tells College Students to Put Down their Dicks, Think of Jesus

“And when you think of masturbation, just think of Jesus.” I think we all know where this guy came from.

Dobby from Harry Potter Turns Me on? Plz Help!

Glad to see this is a “resolved question.”

[VIDEO] A Swiffer for Your Ass: The Comfort Wipe

Perhaps the worst infomercial of all time, the Comfort Wipe has modernized the “archaic” process of wiping your ass.

Junior Christian Science Bible Lesson Scares Off Crackheads and Christians Alike

Leave it to puppets more terrifying than Chucky to help lost souls find Jesus. They should know, since it looks like each doll just rose straight from the pits of Hell.

I’ve gotta go take a cold shower.

~Katie Allyn

BBC Program Encourages Kids to Cut Open Brains

Finally, a step-by-step guide to drilling holes in your roommate’s skull, courtesy of “Look Around You,” a satirical education video by the BBC. Although I can only speculate, watching it must feel similar to watching your 7th grade Bio teacher drop acid and lecture about the human brain.