Words o’ Wisdom: Kim Kardashian Edition

“Sometimes, things don’t work out as planned.” – Kim Kardashian

Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries Call It Quits. (Shocker!)

After spending the equivalent of several hundred tuitions at Harvard on their wedding, and after all of 72 days of wedded bliss, Kim Kardashian and Kris Humprhies have decided to call it quits for reasons currently unknown to the public. But let’s face it, their marriage was doomed from the get-go. I’m totally about to be “that bitch,” but come on, it’s not like I’m the only one who saw this coming.

I think it’s safe to assume that after you find yourself running out of fingers to count the number of professional athletes you’ve said “I love you” to and/or slept with, that you should take it for what it is, drive yourself to a pet store, pick out a kitten and grow old together.

Kim is getting older. She might be beautiful, but how many guys can you possibly say the L-word to or sleep with before finding the right one? You’ll never know if you think that every single guy you’re with is the one you’re “destined to be with,” which is why my number is as low as it is. Maybe Kim should come to me for some advice? I could totally change her life. (Kidding.)

Was Kim Kardashian’s Wedding Too Over the Top?

First the whole world watched in awe as Kate Middleton married Prince William, then this past week everyone cringed while watching Kim Kardashian marry Kris Humphries in an E! two-part special.  Obviously, a wedding as special as Kim’s had to be shown in two parts a month after the actually ceremony took place. Everyone watched the pre-wedding preparations like Kris Jenner’s facelift and Rob’s battle with his weight loss (he’s still cute even at 200+ pounds).

Like every average wedding, Kim had a personal fitting with Vera Wang for her not one, but three dresses and Robin Thicke performed. Also, did I mention Kim and Kris–Humphries that is–were paid $12 million by E! for the exclusive film rights to the wedding. I know a few people who would get married for much less.

News Anchors Mock Kardashians

This past Thursday, sisters Kim and Kourtney Kardashian were interviewed on Philadelphia’s Morning News Program “Good Day” to talk about their newly launched clothing line at Sears. I’m sure you’ve all seen the awfully produced commercials by now. (Because the world can’t seem to get enough Kardashian).

As soon as the interview was over, news anchor Mike Jerrick was under the impression that the cameras had stopped rolling, asking “Can they still hear us?” He, along with co-anchor Sheinelle Jones, then began speaking in high pitched, nasally voices similar to the Kardashian sisters’ voices, while also poking fun at the girls’ apparent love of shoulder pads.

While the video is funny, all I can think is “What were Kourtney and Kim thinking after seeing this?” They couldn’t have been too happy, and I highly doubt that the next Dash store will break ground anywhere near Philadelphia.

-Julia Fuino

Old Navy Uses Kim Kardashian Lookalike in Commercial. Kim’s Pissed.

Kim Kardashian is reportedly suing Old Navy for $20 million after the company casted an apparent Kim Kardashian doppelganger to be in their commercials. Her name is Melissa Molinaro, and she bears a striking resemblance to Kim Kardashian. Kim claims that Old Navy purposely did this to use her celebrity and familiar face to sell their clothes. I don’t find it at all to be a coincidence that the lawsuit has just now been filed, since it recently came to light that Kim’s ex, Reggie Bush, is dating Molinaro. It most likely just added fuel to the fire.

Personally, I think the entire Kardashian clan is just a bunch of walking advertisements, and as much as I want to hate all of them, I’m addicted to their show, follow them on Twitter, bought their terrible book, and, for some ungodly reason, really want to set foot into one of their stores and buy a shirt.  I know, I’m a complete sell out. But the truth of the matter is: we can’t get enough Kardashian. It’s to the point where companies are hiring Kardashian lookalikes to boost their sales.

Kardashian Overload

The Kardashians need to go away. From shoes and jewelry to Sketcher’s Shape Ups and diet pills, the Kardashian name appears to be smacked onto any and every product nowadays. The question is why? Aside from their ability to look pretty and get endorsements, they haven’t contributed much else to the world. In fact, I did some searching to find out what exactly they have their names attached to and here is what I discovered.

Kim Kardashian has an at-home laser hair removal product called Tria Beauty, the family has their own self tanner called Kardashian Glamour Tan, and money loving Kim even endorsed Charmin at their Times Square public bathroom opening. Enough already!

The next step on their conquest of every product ever sold, is a collection called Kardashian Kolors Nicole for OPI. The colors are exceptionally ordinary, but with names like “Listen to your Momager!” and “Follow Me on Glitter,” you know tons of poor celebrity hungry people are going to feed into this. Newsflash to all of you thinking their taupe color is “original,” it’s been out for years. Not to mention their glittery lacquers are just tacky. Please, don’t play into these celebrity products; they definitely don’t need the extra money.

-Victoria Troxler

This Week in Celeb News

It’s trouble in paradise for “Bachelor” Brad Womack and ex-fiance Emily Maynard. The two decided to call it quits after months of serious media speculation, tabloid rumors and everything else that comes with signing yourself up to be on the “Bachelor.” In an interview with People magazine, Emily claims that the two might love each other, but that doesn’t mean that they are right for each other. Could Emily be the next “Bachelorette?”

 

According to recent findings on Ancestry.com, Kate Middleton and Jane Austen have more in common than their love stories. They are eleventh cousins, six times removed. “Finding this connection between the Duchess of Cambridge and Jane Austen is very exciting since, in many ways, Catherine is the modern Jane Austen heroine: a middle-class girl marrying the future King of England,” says lead historian Anastasia Harman.

Kourtesy of Kim K., knock-offs at a Bebe near you!

I’ll admit, I love everything about the Kardashian family. I think “Keeping Up with the Kardashians” is fantastic and I’m not afraid to admit my unhealthy obsession with Kim, Kourt, and Khlo. However, while I support Kim and all her business endeavors, recently she hasn’t been receiving much love from the fashion world.

A week ago Kim was accused of stealing the logo used for her fragrance from Houston based jewelry designer Korcula. Now, the Kardashian sisters are being slandered with accusations that they sent knock-off designs down the Bebe Fall 2010 runway.

Kim defends herself on her blog saying:

“The clothes you see in the chain stores at your mall are all inspired by designer, runway fashion!!! What stores like Bebe do is take runway fashion and use it as inspiration to create pieces that are wearable and accessible for everyone. To say any of our pieces are knockoffs is to say every item in your mall is a knockoff.”