We Wanted to Play Kickball Today…

…but our opponents at the Daily Orange stayed home. For the second year in a row. It was a nice day, too. We declare victory again, improving our series record to 4-0, but we’re disappointed nobody got the chance to see us in our goofy uniforms.

~ The Jerks

Krazy Kickball

America's new pastime

Jerk and the Daily Orange are once again going head-to-head in our sorta-annual staff kickball match next Sunday, April 26th at 3 p.m. on the quad. We say “sorta” annual because last year the D.O. staff were too scared to show up. But we still count it as a win, so come see us try to improve our series record to 4-0.

~ The Jerks

Kickball on the Quad, Vol. 2

As we previously reported, the indie rockers at 20 Watts challenged us to a kickball game on the quad on May 3. They talked some shit and “cleverly” used old issues of Jerk as bases, but we still kicked their asses, 14-6. Our own Ben Watkins actually kicked a ball so hard that it popped (check the evidence below). After being trampled for a a few innings, the pages of our proud publication started to fly everywhere. Members of both staffs complained that we didn’t actually know where the bases were. Next year, we’ll use some of the bad guys’ magazines – fewer pages to float around.

Thanks for trying guys, better luck next time!

Cordially,

Jerk

D.O. Blows Jerk Off

So as we previously reported, we were set to rout The Daily Orange in our third annual staff kickball game last Sunday on the Quad. Unfortunately, only two members of the D.O. staff decided to come. The rest claimed that they were held up by “work” or “final papers” or some similar weak shit. So Jerk won, albeit by forfeit, improving our series record to 3-0.

Here’s our team victory pic, just for you guys at the D.O.

20 Watts is next. Sunday, May 4, 2 p.m. on the Quad. Be there, be drunk.

~ Liam