[via The Onion]
Archive for April, 2010
Tags: getting fat, graduating, Iraq War, The Onion
Tags: cats, Cuty Boy, dubai, gchat, math, world's smartest cat
Cuty Boy, a persian cat from Dubai, could kick your ass on the SATs.
His owners claim this feline phenom knows 8 languages (English, French, Arabic, Persian, and Gujarati, to name a few), and he’s a math wiz.
“I tested him in algebra, geometry, Pythagorean and square roots, and he was right every time,” Sahadevan Panicker, a mathematician at the Gulf Modern School, told India’s Khaleej Times.
Whether or not you believe in Cuty Boy, we can all enjoy his personal website–which comes complete with tacky Indian music and a welcoming message written by his owners to sound like Cuty Boy himself. In it, he warns:
“…please remember that I am not a cat and should not be treated like one. (more…)
Tags: Gay, Hapiness, justin bieber, temporary miracle
[via The Internet is Terrible]
Tags: FailBlog, Jerk Blog, jerk magazine, SAGE -- editor's picks, Vending Machines
I hate when this happens.
Tags: Jerk Blog, jerk magazine, Michigan State, Panties, SAGE -- editor's picks, Thongs, Weird News
According to The Huffington Post, a 19-year-old Michigan State University student faces possible charges after being caught by police with 79 pairs of stolen underwear, each and every one of them being thongs.
One can’t help but wonder the reasons behind this fetish—a lack of exposure to thongs on the regular, perhaps? Said student told the police that it was simply a prank and does not have any kind of sex addiction.
Maybe this poor schmuck doesn’t have a sex addiction, but creeping in laundry rooms and stealing up to 15 pairs of panties at a time is definitely twisted.
By the way dude, you can have all my thongs, I’m in the market for some new underwear anyway.
~Krystie Yandoli, Blog Editor
Tags: Jerk Mag Blog, jerk magazine, WORDS O' WISDOM
Tags: Beer Pong, best college drinking innovation, Cornell, honorable mention, Iowa, party schools, Playboy magazine, Santa Barbara, syracuse university, UNLV
It’s that time of year again. For all anticipating [rather, drooling] dudes out there, Playboy just released their top 10 list of party schools online. Both respectably and surprisingly, Syracuse University doesn’t exactly make the cut, but the following schools get shout-outs regarding their excessive drinking and hookups:
1. University of Texas at Austin
2. West Virginia University
3. University of Wisconsin-Madison
4. University of Miami, Florida
5. East Caroline University
6. Arizona State University
7. Rollins College
8. University of California Santa Barbara
9. Plymouth State University
10. University of Iowa
My favorite part of this list is the “honorable mentions” section—it sheds light on “the college that sounds fun but isn’t” (UNLV), “the best name for beer pong” (beer pong), and “the worst course” (tree climbing at Cornell University).
Potential goal for next year: an honorable mention for SU in the “Best College Drinking Innovation” category. The current winner is “The Flabongo, a beer made out of a lawn flamingo.”
Sweet analysis, Playboy. (more…)
Tags: blog-o-sphere, equal rights, Feminism, gender rights, I'm Ranting, Jerk Blog, jerk magazine, Kate Holloway, Leadership, Newt Gingrich, Role Model, SAGE -- editor's picks, sarah palin, YouTube
Executive Web Editor extraordinaire for Jerk Magazine, Kate Holloway, inquired my thoughts via her Facebook status after the blog-o-sphere exploded concerning the newest accusations concerning Sarah Palin and feminism.
In my book, Sarah Palin does not support feminist ideals, therefore it is difficult for me to associate her with the progressive, never-ending fight for equal rights between genders. Scratch that—it’s nearly impossible for me to consider her a feminist.
Strong women exemplify components of feminism no matter what—Palin’s leadership in her otherwise lacking party is admirable, especially considering current gender roles in politics. Gender aside, I would never elect an individual to greater office who chose to step down from their position as Governor in order to write books, appear on Fox news as a contributing analyst, and signs deals with TLC for reality shows. Woman or man—that can’t be my next President. (more…)
Tags: ABC Family, activism, Bristol Palin, Candie's Commercial, Ellen page, I'm Ranting, jerk magazine, Juno, Krystie Yandoli, MTV, SAGE -- editor's picks, Teenage Pregnancy
Dear Bristol Palin,
Celebrating my 20th birthday meant a few things: one more year until I’m legal, Syracuse beat Villanova in a historical NCAA basketball match-up, and I dodged the possibility of falling victim to teenage pregnancy.
There has been a surge of teenage pregnancy in popular culture throughout the past few years, like Ellen Page’s famous breakout role in Juno, MTV’s reality show “16 and Pregnant,” and ABC Family’s hit series “The Secret Life of the American Teenager.” While pop culture has a strong hold on this subject matter, I’ve been aware of your baby situation due to all of your media appearances.